It is strange to consider that soon I won’t be writing “Four” anymore. Your dad and I went through the massive list of names and we continue to narrow it down. I have fun trying to imagine you are a XXX or XXX. I am keeping it a surprise for now…your name will be between just your dad and me. I really hope no one tells me to my face that they don’t like whatever we end up picking for you. There is a time to share opinions and there are times not to. I still have hurt feelings over how much your dad’s side of the family made fun of the wedding band I picked out for him. I searched for a long time to find something meaningful and unique. Oh well. I think your dad likes it now even if it is incredibly bright blue, which was to remind us of the Caribbean Sea.
I am trying to recall these past few Valentine’s Days. For this year, 2017, I am pregnant with you. We will be taking it easy and just trying to keep me as comfortable as possible for as long as possible, meaning no going out. Hopefully your dad will cook up a delicious dinner here. Last year we went to Catch 35 for Valentine’s Day (we went a day early as the real day is crazy crowded). In 2015, we were newly engaged and stayed home where your dad cooked dry aged New York strip steaks, asparagus, and baked potatoes. I have a funny pic of him at the stove doing that. And going back to 2014, we were talking to one another online and had yet to meet in person as I was sporting a metal pin sticking out of the end of my broken pinky. I really hope that your dad saved all of our communications with one another. I would like to look at those again sometime.
It is pretty amazing how fast we have moved into a life together. It has only been three years, which is not a lot of time, but we were very good about getting a lot of quality with our time together because we both wanted to be parents too…and, well, we both knew we were getting old for that. So here we are: married, building a home together, and about to be new parents. It is all so dreamlike at times. I count my blessings and your dad and I always tell one another what we are grateful for in one another each and every night. I am just overwhelmed with so many blessings. Sure we have had struggles too, but that only makes the reward of having dreams realized all the better.
Last night we went to our 2nd childbirth class. Your dad was all concerned that we didn’t complete our homework. I said that we will be okay. We are well organized and really on top of things as we get into this final stretch. We completed that checklist right at the start of class and scored great, meaning that we are well prepared for labor. I feel like the organizational work I did yesterday helped me to feel like I can be ready for anything. I made a to-do list at 2 am when I couldn’t sleep. I woke up ready to tackle it. I have some errands to run, but I think I will be able to get that all done even with how busy these next few weeks are going to be. Even though today is Valentine’s Day, we will probably be cleaning the house. Wednesday some of my team ladies are coming over to do a shower for me here. I am looking forward to that because your dad will get to meet a lot of nice people and show off your nursery. I have no idea how many ladies are coming, but I plan to have their favors ready to go. I am close to being done making favors, as I think it is a nice gesture for people who are going out of their way to celebrate you and me. We are doing owl luggage tags for the Wed night ladies and the guests at your Grandma G’s shower. Then we are doing little cookie treats for the Sunday ladies. Aunt A has the favors for the Saturday shower, but I may bring the cookies too. I made plenty and they were super easy to do. I just need to print some more things and get the rest of the owl tags done. Thursday and Friday should be nice days, so I think I will get a lot done then. Saturday and Sunday are both showers and I can’t wait to see people from both groups that I haven’t seen in a while. Hopefully people can make it even though it is over a long weekend when a lot of people travel.
So let’s talk a little about Valentine’s Day. When you are a little guy, you will probably celebrate this at school. I totally remember these days. We made little mailboxes for our cards. I had to do valentines for each kid in my class. Back when I was little, we just got some tear apart cards and if we were really splurging, we would add stickers. Now valentines have gotten a lot more complex. They have treats, toys, even little jars of slime on them. Some schools are not celebrating the day as it does bring out some issues like requiring poorer students having to come up with something. I get it. There were those issues when I was young too. I also remember how it was sometimes very obvious which kids others were excited to give cards to and which kids they were obliged to give cards to…maybe even with a little bit of poking fun at the poor kids too. I really hope that you never have to be the butt of a joke on a day when you want to celebrate. I am sure that I was, probably in 2nd grade when I was picked on for my “boy” haircut and my chubby cheeks. It is a foggy memory now, but the sour taste of it lingers still. Valentine’s is nice as it reaffirms the power of and the importance of love. Your family has been loving you from your very first spark of life. I can’t imagine how much love will flood over me when I finally hold you too. There are so many people to love. Obviously I love your father dearly. He is my world and our love is both romantic and earnest. It is a love that I truly did wait for because what I thought was love before was only ever a fraction of what I feel for your dad. There is the love that I have for family. I knew the love of my side of the family for a long time and now have a love for your dad’s side too. Speaking of that Grandpa E brought me flowers for Valentine’s Day. See? What a great father-in-law! I love Aunt D as if she had been a sister to me my whole life. I love our cats and have loved all of the pets before them too. I loved, and still love, my teddy bear that I have had my whole life. I love certain books because of how they make me feel and the thoughts they inspire. I love certain poems too. I love animals, and certain ones in particular because I empathize with them. I love Star Wars – ha! Okay, and lastly, there are some foods that I fear I love a little too much. Well, time to get on with the day. I will add that I am loving this sunshine as we have missed it for so long. I am still struggling with sleep, but I will not indulge in caffeine, no matter how much the whole lack of sleep is impacting me. Happy Valentine’s Day baby! Thanks for the kicks to let me know you are doing ok! I will give you gentle tummy rubs to soothe you and together we will have a sunny Valentine’s Day! Hugs and kisses!